Several years ago, I worked with a leader who thought she was an open and honest person. Yet, when I talked to her coworkers, I heard repeatedly that they did not trust her. They felt that she shaded the truth, hid things from them, and talked about them behind their backs. When I gave her the feedback, she was shocked.
Here are some suggestions I gave her on how to understand herself better and to see herself through the eyes of others?
1. At the end of conversations, ask for feedback on how well the conversation was received by the other party.
2. Listen to the feedback without defending yourself.
3. Act on the feedback by trying to improve yourself and not by an act of retribution toward the person providing feedback.
4. Don’t tell people you are “open and should be trusted”. Work to earn their trust.
5. Remember one act of dishonesty can ruin trust that has been built up over years.
For more on emotional intelligence, please see my video on emotional intelligence which I recently did for U of M Alumni Association.
Coach Rob
rob@leadersconnect.com
www.robertpasick.com
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